Christmas with the Moores
by staceycj
Summary: Jessica invites Dean to Christmas Eve dinner.
1. Chapter 1

Slamming the door didn't make him feel any better. The room was still empty, it was still December 23 and he still was alone for the holidays. Dean put his purchases on the small desk and shed his outer layers. It was butt freezing cold up here in Colorado, and it didn't seem to matter how many shirts or gloves, or the fact that he was wearing freaking thermal underwear, he was still cold down to his bones. Lately, he'd been having a harder time getting warm. People kept preaching about this whole global warming thing and how we needed protect the environment or we were all going to cook. He was fairly certain that they got it wrong. He couldn't remember a time when it had been colder.

The motel heater didn't work very well, and he decided that a warm bath would do him good before he settled down to spend the next three days in a drunken stupor. He was just about to take off his jeans when his cell phone rang. Confused, he hurried into the actual room and rooted through his bag until he found the thing, and he starred at the number for a second, realizing he didn't know it, deciding it didn't matter, it would just be nice to hear another human voice, he answered it.

"Hello?"

"Is this Dean Winchester?" A female voice on the other end asked. Dean paused and tried to figure out who he would have given his real name to. Most of his one nigh stands were lucky to get his first name and never received his real last name. Cassie was the only woman who knew his name and this wasn't her.

"Depends. Who is this?"

"This is Jessica Moore." His heart stilled. Sammy's girl. The only reason she would attempt to get a hold of him would be to tell him that Sam was dead, hurt, or something else equally catastrophic.

"This is Dean."

"Good." She let out a deep breath, it sounded like she was smiling now. "I've called everyone in his phone book looking for you."

"What? Why?"

"I have a question for you."

"Just spit it out…is he hurt?"

"Oh, no, no, no! He's fine. I'm sorry. No, he's fine. Safe and sound. He's in the shower right now actually. I need to make this quick."

Relief was almost a tangible thing for him. His shoulders sagged and he pinched the bridge of his nose. He was almost dizzy with relief. He sat down on the bed.

"Okay. What do you need?"

"I wanted you to come here for Christmas."

"You want me to come to California for Christmas?"

"No. I want you to come to Wyoming. My family lives in Falls Creek. And we are having a big dinner tomorrow night, and I wanted you to come for Sam."

"Sam and I don't speak."

"I know…." she hesitated. "But, I want you to come."

"I don't know if that's a good idea Jessica."

"Just…just…"

"Jessica? Jess? Where are you?" Dean heard Sam's voice for the first time in three years. He was okay. Hell, his voice was deeper and stronger than he remembered. His little brother had grown up. He didn't realize that he had closed his eyes to savor the moment until he heard Jessica start to speak again in a hurried whisper.

"It's 222 Ames Street Falls Creek Wyoming. We'll eat around 7. Come earlier if you could." She hung up quickly and Dean was left with silence on the other end of his phone. He clicked it off and starred at it for a moment.

He licked his lips, shook his head, and threw the phone on the dresser and went and took his shower.

The idea of him going to the Moore's house for Christmas was ludicrous wasn't it? What in the world would they have to say to each other? What in the world would he have to say to Sammy? It wasn't like he wanted to talk shop with his baby brother, but other than talking shop, what was there to say? He could ask about school and let his brother ramble on and on, but eventually there would be an end to the conversation, and there would be no need for Sam to ask what he had been doing, because he knew, and it wasn't exactly like he could talk about it in mixed company.

And if he could put the conversational hiccup aside, there was that whole issue of being with normal people for a normal meal. He didn't know how to do that. What did he say to Jessica's mother, father, siblings, friends, relatives? He didn't know what to talk about with normal people. Cassie, well, he'd talked to her about movies, and he'd listened to her about school, and stuff like that. But eventually people, normal people, want to get to know you, learn something about your job, your family, that kinda stuff, and how exactly did you explain the whole killing ghosts goblins and the like for a living. The simple answer was you don't. And if you cared about the people you were with, lying wasn't an option. He didn't want to have to weave a story for Jessica and her family, and he didn't know what Sam had already told them, so, yeah, it was best if he stayed here.

Sam had always craved normal, and he was getting it. He was getting the picture perfect Thomas Kincaid Christmas and he didn't want to be the black blotch on the canvas. He didn't want to be the one part of that special day that Sam remembered as bad. And that was what would happen if he went. No. He wouldn't go. He wouldn't ruin this for Sammy.

***

"Who were you talking to Jess?" Sam asked as he pulled a shirt over his head.

"My cousin. She lost our address and needed it again. She is horrible with directions and she wanted to mapquest it and get it right."

"Ahhh." He said and pulled a sweater over the shirt. "Your dad and brother want me to go out and help them find a tree in the woods." He said and began brushing his hair.

"We do that every year. The Moore men go out and hunt up a tree." Sam just nodded.

"It is very nice of them to include me."

"You're family." She said with a shrug. Sam looked at her for a second and then went back to his morning ritual. "What did you guys do for Christmas?" Sam shrugged.

"Nothing. We didn't have money."

"But there must have been something?"

"Jess. It doesn't matter. Nothing happens anymore. It is just the way it is. You can't change it."

"But, Sam, your brother…"

"Is a big boy and doesn't need me to make his Christmases wonderful."

"But family…"

"I don't have one anymore Jessica. They disowned me, and that's that. I'm not about to go running to them, when they obviously don't want me around, so just drop it Jess. I'm fine without them." Jessica watched as he hurriedly pulled his shoes on and sharply pulled his shoe strings and angrily tied them. Before she could put a hand on his to reassure him or apologize, her older brother, Clint, came in and collected Sam to go with the rest of the men out tree hunting.

She was left starring at his retreating form. Sam wanted his family, that much she knew, and the bravado that he displayed was just to keep his hurting heart from being exposed. She respected that. But, it made her pray all the more for God to guide Dean Winchester to her house, to their table, and back into Sam's world.


	2. Arrival

It was hard for Dean to move after Jessica ended their phone call. He wasn't sure what to make of it. First and foremost, he was positive he wasn't going to go. There was no way in hell he would be able to go and sit through a meal with these people, and Sam most certainly didn't want him there. If he did he would have called himself and invited him. Dean shook his head, put the phone on the dresser and continued to strip his clothes for his warm bath.

"What if Sammy didn't call me because there is some code or something somewhere that says if you are a guest you can't invite someone else?" Dean mused aloud. It had been so long since he'd actually spoken to people that he had taken to talking to himself in the shower or in the car.

"That right there is proof that I shouldn't go." He said. "I don't even know the proper etiquette for inviting people. No. It's better that I just not go. This Jessica girl may just be trying to do something nice for Sam. He probably doesn't even want me there. Naw, she's doing this on her own, Sam didn't prompt her." He finished washing and went into the bedroom portion of his room, took his purchase off of the table and sat down on the bed, ready to turn on some bad television and get drunk.

He opened the bottle and looked at it. If he was drunk he wasn't going to be able to go to Jessica's, and see Sam. But he'd decided against it, hadn't he? The longer he looked around the room, at the television, and the bottle, the longer he heard the silence pressing in on him, the more he thought about what it would be like to have a sit down Christmas eve dinner. What it would be like to have a home cooked meal. One that wasn't donated by the church because some kind hearted old woman couldn't stand to see Sam not be fed, because he always knew, even then, that those women were more worried about Sam then they were him.

Dean shook the thoughts out of his head. He wasn't the one who wanted normal…wasn't the one who dreamed of a home cooked meal, with a mom and a dad and aunts and uncles and grandparents, and a girl at his side that was so beautiful it was almost painful to look at her. Nope. That was Sam's. Wasn't it? The bottle made it half way to his mouth, and he stopped. Maybe…maybe he could borrow that fantasy, even if it was just for a little while. Maybe Sam would see him, smile, clap him on the shoulder and say "Good to see you man. I've missed you." Maybe he could have a new relationship with his brother, and maybe they could actually be friends again.

He put the cap back on the liquor and got dressed. He needed to go and buy a new outfit and a gift.

***

Every single time the doorbell rang, Jessica was up and on her feet and answering it. Her mother knew that she was waiting and hoping that Sam's brother would show up, Jessica seemed under the impression that his brother coming over would make Sam happy. Jessica's mother decided that she knew the boy better than she did, but she was fairly certain the tall gangly boy was just fine without speaking to his family. She half wondered sometimes if the boy had been abused when he was young, he always had that wary look, and sometimes he was positively jittery when someone was walking behind him.

This time when the doorbell rang and Jessica skidded in her socks to answer it, she found a tall handsome man. Short hair, green eyes, sweater, and a smile that was nervous and intoxicating. This must be Dean.

"Dean?" she asked. He shuffled his feet, patted the sweater that was peeking out from a worn, slightly too big leather jacket and nodded.

"Jessica?" he asked. She jumped and laughed. Blonde curls going every which way, and she grabbed him and hugged him.

"I'm so glad you came."

"Thanks." He said softly. She let go and he handed her the bottle of wine the woman at the grocery store said was appropriate, and the gift bag of assorted candles for her mother. It had been very difficult for him to locate these gifts. The woman at the grocery store looked at him for a moment, gave him a sympathetic smile and helped him with everything. She was what he thought a grandmother might be like.

"Oh, let me get your coat. Sam's in the living room." She took his coat and threw it in a bedroom that was already full of coats. Then she escorted him into an empty bedroom and told him to stay right there, and then she disappeared. He stood there and rubbed his hands together, wondering why exactly he was here, wondering why he was doing this, when he heard Sam's voice coming up the stairs and then the door opened and when Sam saw who was inside, he stopped, his smile fell and he blinked hard.

"Sammy." He said gruffly.

"Dean. What are you doing here?"

"I invited him." Jessica said after Sam's lukewarm greeting.

"How did you get his number?"

"Well…" She had the grace to look embarrassed. "I looked through your phone." She said softly. He nodded.

"Jess, excuse us for a moment."

"Of course." She smiled and left them.

"What are you doing here Dean?"

"She invited me. I just wanted to see you this Christmas."

"Christmas hasn't meant anything to you in a long time."

"I know…but…she called…"

"And you wanted a free meal?"

"No. No. No. Sammy, I just…"

"It's Sam." Dean bristled.

"I don't want anything." Dean said finally and he felt like he had been defeated by an onslaught of supernatural beings.

"Don't you dare embarrass me or Jessica." Dean looked down and licked his lips.

"I won't Sam." He said softly. He shook his head. "I knew I shouldn't have come." He said and grabbed his coat. "Sorry Sam, didn't mean to intrude."


	3. Course Correction

Dean had his coat on and was opening the door before Sam could register what he was doing. He hadn't expected Dean to just leave. He hadn't wanted Dean to just leave. He wanted to yell at his brother, wanted to fight with him, then he wanted him to go downstairs and sit with him and have Christmas dinner with him. Never had he expected Dean to be hurt and just leave.

"Wait.." Sam said as the door was almost shut. Dean didn't stop, he simply walked calmly down the stairs towards the door. Jessica saw him and stopped him.

"Where…"

"Thank you for the invitation. It was very kind of you." He said with a smile. "I can't stay." Just as he was saying the last, Jessica heard Sam hurrying down the stairs.

"Dean." He said trying to get his brother's attention.

Dean simply turned, gave a sad smile and said, "See ya Sammy," walked past Jessica and out the door. Sam hurried back upstairs, grabbed his coat and ran outside faster than anything Jessica had ever seen. Sam stopped his brother before he closed the car door.

"Dean. Stay." He said frantically.

"You made it clear Sam. I'm leaving. I won't embarrass you or Jessica that way."

"No. No. Please stay." Dean didn't understand his brother. That realization hit him like a ton of bricks. He didn't know his brother anymore. He didn't understand why one minute he was telling Dean not to embarrass him and the next begging him to stay.

"I didn't meet any of her family. It's not like you have to save face now Sammy."

"What?"

"They won't think less of you."

"That's not it."

"Then what exactly are you doing Sam?"

"I…I…"

"I didn't want anything Sam. I swear. I didn't want to embarrass you. I just wanted to come and sit down and listen to you talk about school, get to know the girl that will probably become my sister-in-law, and if there was a home cooked meal, all the better, but that wasn't why I came. And since I came to see you and you don't' want me here, then I just should go. I don't want to screw up your normal." He said and tried to pull his door shut but Sam's hand was preventing the action.

"I…I'm sorry Dean. When I saw you…I wanted to be mad. I wanted you to fight me. I wanted to yell at you….why didn't you ever call?"

"You made it clear when you left you didn't 'this family' to ever call you, because all 'this family did was bring destruction and misery into your life and to the other lives it touches' I think were the exact words you used." Sam bowed his head, ashamed. "So, I didn't think a call from me would be exactly welcome."

"Oh." Was all Sam could say. Dean was right. That was exactly what he screamed at his father the night he left. Sam hadn't expected Dean to think he was included in that statement, but hearing it out loud made him realize that he had accidentally included Dean in the equation. All of that righteous anger he had held onto for the three years while at school melted away and shame was it's less pleasant replacement.

The screen door opened and shut and both men turned and looked, Jessica, wrapped in a big coat was striding towards them. Dean looked down, ashamed and humiliated and Sam watched her come. Her stride indicated she was mad, and the set to her face just confirmed it.

"Sam." She said and her tone indicated that he better watch out. He was the source of her anger and he had the good grace to look away from her eyes. She turned her attentions to Dean and her features softened. He looked sad and she hadn't meant him to drive all of this way so he could be upset and then have to drive all of the way back. Understanding the Winchester family was like trying to understand God and his reasons for everything happening the way it did. "Dean. I want you to stay for dinner. I want you here. Even if Sam doesn't." She wanted this man to feel welcome in her family home, wanted him to stay, just so she could get to know him better if nothing else.

"Jessica."

"There is no arguing with me. I want you here. And this is my family's Christmas dinner. Now, get out of the car, and get back inside. I will not take no for an answer." Jessica looked at her boyfriend and glared. Sam moved away from the door and Dean got back out of the car.

"Jessica, really, I…"

"I don't want to hear it. You are my guest. There is plenty of food. And my brothers would like to discuss this huge thing with you." She said and patted the door. Dean smiled.

"Sweetheart, this is a thing of beauty." She cracked a smile, she knew that comment would get the older man to smile. She knew exactly what kind of car it was, and wanted to get herself behind the wheel of the beauty, but right now, it seemed best to play dumb and get him to smile.

"Yeah, yeah, that's what my brothers are saying. Come on boys. Let's go have a family dinner." Dean closed the car door and put the keys in his pocket. Sam took his place beside Jessica and Dean admired Sam for his choice. She was smart, sassy, intelligent, and kind.

Dean put his hands in his coat pockets, a little nervous. He was afraid he would embarrass Sam no matter what his intentions were. Truth of the matter was he was uncouth and he knew it. Once, an elderly woman said that he was wild, untamed, and he supposed she was right. He resisted the urge to tuck tail and run.


	4. Dinner

Jessica took both of their coats upon entering the house, told Sam firmly to wait there, and she ran back upstairs. An older, but very beautiful woman, peeked her head into the living room where both Sam and Dean were standing.

"Sam? Are you going to introduce us?" she asked as she came closer, her hand extended towards Dean. He extended his hand as well and tried to affix a happy, not nervous, smile to his lips.

"Mrs. Moore, this is my brother Dean. Dean this is Jessica's mother Abigail Moore."

"Pleasure to meet you ma'am," he said and shook her hand.

"You are the one responsible for the beautiful candles?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Thank you so much. They are beautiful." Dean nodded, and found himself at a complete and total loss. What did you say to someone who didn't know you but invited you to dinner because…well…he had really no firm handle on why exactly she allowed Jessica to invite him for dinner. He was positive that Sam had told Jessica stories about him that were probably not exactly nice, and truth be told that made him even more nervous. "Come, come. Food is just about on the table."

"Jess told us to wait for her." Sam said looking up towards the coat room.

"I'm her mother, you do what I say, not what she says." Sam gave a small grin and Dean followed his brother's lead. They went into the dining room and Dean almost took pause and breath when he saw it. He thought meals like this only existed in the movies. Or at least that's what he had convinced himself. All of those years, when he was small, when they barely had food on the table and Dad was on a hunt, Dean had made himself believe that real people didn't have long tables, filled with home made food, and friends, and family, conversation, candles, and love. It made him feel better and helped him with Sammy. Helped him in the sense that he could tell Sam that what he saw on TV were just TV families and that normal people had something closer to what they were having.

But here it was in all of its glory and it almost took his breath away. Jessica came up behind him and put a hand on his shoulder, smile on her face and then went and sat beside his brother. Dean sat down where Jessica's mother pointed. The whole family stopped when they realized a stranger in their midst. Dean couldn't help but wonder when one of them was going to yell 'get him out of here. He doesn't belong at our table. He's nothing more than a motherless hoodlum.' He licked his lips at the sudden stop in conversation and looked around at all of the people nervously.

Jessica smiled and reached around Sam and grabbed Dean's arm and said, "Everyone this is Sam's older brother Dean. Dean this is…" Jessica went through every single person at the table, and for all of Dean's skills, he was having a hard time remembering names, they seemed to fly right through his ears. When the introductions were finished everyone was still starring and silent. Dean wanted to run; the impulse was so strong that his legs ached with the need.

"Well, Jessica, I'll be damned." Came the voice of a woman, wearing an expensive suit, sporting an expensive hair cut, and startled Dean. "If I would have known that Sam had such a handsome older brother, I think I would have held out." She said and patted her husband's arm. Everyone at the table laughed and Dean took a breath and laughed as well. He caught the eye of the woman at the end of the table and noted her wink. He acknowledged it. He was thankful that she was trying to put him at ease.

"So, where are you from Dean?" James, Jessica's father, asked.

"Right now I'm living in Colorado." Dean said and glanced towards Sam, who was signaling that Dean was fine.

"You like it there?"

"It's good. I like it."

"What do you do?" Another woman on their side of the table asked.

"I, uh," he gave a nervous laugh and cleared his throat. "I help people." He said simply, deciding that it wasn't a gross lie, and it was vague enough that he didn't have to remember the lie.

"What exactly do you do for that?"

"I work with various programs that help people."

"Well, that's sounds very noble."

"Just what I'm good at." He replied easily and took a sip of the water that was sitting at his place setting.

"Well, we're going to be family real soon here, if your brother ever gets around to popping the question that I know he's going to pop eventually, and I like my family close. So, if you aren't married to Colorado, I would love for you to come up here, and I could use you at the firm."

Dean licked his lips and suddenly felt incredibly self conscious. "Sir, that is very nice of you, but I don't have a college education."

"You won't need one. I just need someone to help me manage my pro bono work. You know, work with the clients, that sort of thing."

"Thank you sir." Jessica's dad smiled and raised his glass to the younger man. Jessica sighed.

"Daddy, you promised no shop talk."

"I didn't…" he grinned at his daughter. "I'm sorry baby." Jessica's grin seemed to signal the beginning of twenty different conversations at once. Dean was pulled into a conversation about cars with Jessica's brothers, then with her grandmother about Colorado, and then with her mother about the food, which he was doing his best not to appear like a pig. He could have stuffed all of her good home cooking in his face and not thought twice, but with Sam beside him, who he knew would get mad if he ate like he usually did, he did his best to keep his consumption equal with his brother's.

They had pie afterwards and that was the only time when he splurged and allowed himself to be persuaded into a second piece of pie.

The family finished eating and the conversation continued, and Jessica's mother and grandmother got up and began clearing away the dishes. Dean stood and began clearing as well. His hands were batted away and he was sent to go back out and sit with his brother.

Dean heard the clock strike midnight and looked around at the family that he was surrounded by, and realized that despite their warm welcome, and their acceptance, that he didn't really belong here. This was Sammy's family now. He pursed his lips.

"Thanks everyone for the wonderful food and conversation. I'm going to head out." He said and stood. Abigail looked at Dean confused.

"I thought you were staying the night."

"No, ma'am. I can't impose on anyone's Christmas like that."

"You going to spend the time with your dad?" One of Jessica's brother's asked.

"Yeah. I am." He lied.

"We really can't convince you to stay?" Abigail asked again.

"No, I'm sorry ma'am." She stood and gave him a hug.

"It was a pleasure to meet you. You have to come back again." Dean nodded and headed towards the living room and his ears rang with a chorus of "Merry Christmas" and "Bye!" Sam was the one to give him the coat and he looked his brother in the eye.

"Thanks."

"You have a great girl."

"I do."

"Take care of her." Dean slipped on his coat.

"I will." Dean nodded and turned for the door. Sam spun him back around. "I'm sorry about…" Dean put a hand up.

"Forgotten."

"You going to be okay?"

"Yeah, of course."

"You and Dad really gonna be together?"

"Yeah." Sam nodded.

"I'm glad you came." Dean just nodded once, and opened the door to leave.

"Bye Sammy." And he closed the door behind him.

That night, in a secluded snowy spot in Wyoming, Dean Winchester pulled blankets around his shaking form in the only home he had ever known---the Impala.

That night, in a warm house full of love and comfort, Sam Winchester pulled the blankets up over his and Jessica's bodies and slept in the first place he considered home.

End


	5. Epilogue

**This came to me at work last night. I didn't have time to edit. It may be a little rough. But I thought I owed it to you guys today. Thanks SOOOO much for reading this story!**

Sleep didn't exactly last for long. Sam found himself awake every half an hour, and around 2:30 he gave up and got up. Dean was on his mind. Neither one of them had exactly done anything to rectify their silence. Sam regretted the few words he had spoken to his brother. It just simply went all wrong. Sam got out of the bed, careful not to wake Jessica, grabbed his laptop from the desk, and headed downstairs to the silent living room.

Part of the reason that Sam was up and unable to sleep was because he was fairly certain that his brother had lied when he said that he would be spending Christmas with their father. It was just something in the way he said it, the look he gave something, Sam couldn't quite pin it down, but there was something that just told him that it was all wrong.

He ended up hacking into the cell phone company that he knew Dean used, and with ease he was able to activate the GPS in Dean's cell and he found that he was in a stationary position not too far from the house. Sam googled the coordinates and discovered that it was nothing more than a wooded area just outside the city. Sam sat back against the couch and ran a hand down his long face. Should he go? Would he be welcome? Why was Dean out in the middle of nowhere? Had he found a hunt? Should he be worried? His mind raced and he decided the only way to calm it down would be to go look. If nothing else, he would be accused of being a girl, and would end up back here before dawn and no hard feelings. At worst, Dean would be mad that he was discovered, and they would just deepen the rift between them.

He pulled clothes on quietly, using stealth that was learned in their family like some children learned how to cry on cue to get a toy, he managed not to wake anyone in the house, as he left, got in his rented car, and took off for the coordinates that claimed to hold his brother.

When he arrived, he barely saw the back of the big black machine that Dean prided himself on. He turned off the car, and got out, and headed towards it. When he was able to see inside, his night vision being better than most, he saw his brother swaddled in blankets in the back seat of the car, slightly shivering and by all appearances to be asleep.

There was going to be no company for Dean Winchester this Christmas. There would be no food, not even cheep diner food, no presents, no conversation, no anything. It would simply be a quiet day where no one was out and about, no bars open for him to get drunk, no places for him to gorge himself on greasy foods, and no waitresses to charm out of their skirts. His brother was going to spend the entire day in his car. Because it was the only thing that hadn't left him. It was the only thing in the world allow him his quirks, his stubbornness, his thoughts, and opinions, and not take off when he wasn't looking. That realization soured the good foods in his stomach.

Tapping on the window, Sam braced for impact. Instead, he got a brother who opened his eyes and a hand which slid under his pillow, which Sam knew was now holding a very long, very sharp knife. He watched as Dean's eyes focused and dismay and confusion clouded the green depths.

He sat up clumsily, and rolled down the window. "I didn't steal anything." He said thickly and turned his big eyes up to his brothers. Sam's mouth went dry.

"I know you didn't."

"Then why are you here? Hell why did you come looking?"

"I…."

"Come on college boy, you had a reason." Dean couldn't stop the shivers that ran up his spine.

"Dean. Come on. My car is warm. Let's go sit there for a while."

"And abandon my baby?" He said, and the reality hit Sam again. Dean didn't leave family. His family left him.

"Can I get in then?"

"You're home too." He said and unlocked the door, and scooted over. Sam a little unsettled by the comment got inside and wrapped one of Dean's blankets over himself. "You need another one? There's one in the trunk still."

"Why don't you use it for yourself if you are going to be stubborn and sleep here?"

"Not stubborn. Just no more money."

"Come on Dean. You have a slew of credit cards and you hustle better than dad."

"Nope. I don't hustle around Christmas, and I don't use the cards either. Those people have families, little ones that want toys and clothes and Ipods, whatever in the hell those things are." He said and drew his blanket a little closer. "Used the last of the money I got from saving…"

"You took money?" Sam said flabbergasted. Dean never took money for a job. He always said it made him feel dirty. He was just doing something for someone else, just doing what he wished others had done for his mom.

"I'm not proud of it. But she gave me five hundred dollars for saving her kid. Said it was all she could give me. I took it because I needed it, and I wish I hadn't….but…I needed the money. I liked the meal she gave me more. After Christmas I'm gonna hustle that money back for her. I can't…" he stopped and shook his head. "That isn't why you are here. What do you need Sammy?"

"I just wanted to apologize."

"For not wanting me to crash your family dinner? Nah. You were right. I was the wrong one. I shouldn't have come. They are your family." Dean swayed a little and huddled into his blankets a little more. "Sides. It was obvious that I didn't belong with those people. I bet her mom counted the silver when I left." Dean tried to make light of the whole thing and Sam's heart which had hardened towards his real family started to soften and hurt at the words.

"No. Her mother liked you very much. She said she wished she had a daughter she could marry you off to." Dean gave a chuckle.

"I highly doubt that. Really Sammy, what do you want?"

"I wanted to know why you didn't call me."

"What?"

"After I left. Why didn't you call? Were you ordered not to?"

"You could have called me too dude."

"So dad did order you to not call." Sam's voice came out cold and dark. That was exactly like Dean. Always following Dad's orders like a good little soldier. God forbid Dean use his own brain and do what he wanted to do.

"No. I figured you had ordered me not to. So I didn't."

"What?"

"The way you stormed out. The way you wouldn't talk to me when you left. The giant F-you you gave us as you turned and left. I thought that pretty much meant for me to leave you the hell alone. So, I did."

"Oh."

"Sam. Just go back to the house, go enjoy your Christmas. This isn't that important."

"This is incredibly important. You're my brother."

"We share DNA. Those people are the family you want. I'm the life and the kind of people you don't want, and have made it very clear to all that you don't want. Just go back to that girl. She's beautiful. Her family is a good one to be a part of. I can't offer that to you. All I can promise is stealing, death, lying, and pain. She can promise you all of the good things. Just go. Please." Sam starred at Dean and hurt and confusion ran through him like a truck.

"Okay." He said softly and got out of the Impala, and closed the door quietly.

"Hey Sammy?" Dean called right before he went to roll up the window.

"Yeah?"

"Merry Christmas." Tears formed in Sam's eyes.

"You too." The window rolled up and Dean's head disappeared. Sam went back 'home' and back into bed with his girl. Suddenly the warmpth and comfort seemed hollow, the house wasn't as warm and Jessica's embrace wasn't so comforting. Not with his brother all alone, freezing in the car on Christmas.

**Officially the end!**


End file.
